Somatic Movement for the Post-Diagnosis Identity Crisis
Receiving a late ADHD or Autism diagnosis is rarely a single moment of clarity. Instead, it can feel more like a controlled demolition of everything you thought you knew about your past and yourself.
In the wake of a diagnosis, most people experience a deep grief (and sometimes anger) for the struggling child who wasn't helped and relief for the explanation that finally fits.
This can feel like a bit of an identity crisis, not just mentally, but physically as well. The years of trying harder and failing are stored in your muscles as tension, bracing, and a constant state of hypervigilance.
To rewire the narrative of your life, you have to move the story out of your head and into your body.
The Limits of "Thinking" Your Way Out
Talk therapy is invaluable and a really important part of the healing process. But the neurodivergent identity crisis often hits a logic wall. You can intellectually understand that you weren't lazy, but your body still carries the shame of every forgotten assignment or social mistake.
Somatic movement allows you to process these emotions without needing to find the perfect words. It bypasses the Analytical Monitor - that part of your brain that is always checking if you’re doing it right - and speaks directly to the nervous system.
Two Somatic Tools
Here are two accessible, low-demand somatic movements that you can do to release a narrative that you’ve been holding onto.
Choose one that works best for you. Some people love to shake while others find it too stimulating for their nervous system, especially if you also have chronic pain or fatigue. The sway is more gentle and may feel more accessible initially, building up in time to something more stimulating.
The Grief Shake
What it does: releases the lazy label
Shame and the try harder cycle create a physical bracing in the core and shoulders. Shaking is an ancient biological mechanism for discharging pent-up survival energy. Animals naturally shake when adrenaline is leaving the body, but if we’ve been bracing then this may not have been able to occur.
The Practice: Stand or sit comfortably. Start by gently shaking your hands, then your arms, then your shoulders.
The Narrative: As you shake, visualise the labels people gave you - lazy, dramatic, spacey, too much - literally falling off your skin and hitting the floor. See them dissolve and disappear.
The Result: You aren't just relaxing’, you are teaching your nervous system that the threat of those judgments is over.
The Intuitive Sway
What it does: helps you find your natural rhythm
Masking often involves freezing our natural movements to appear more still or “normal." This exercise helps you rediscover your body's preferred cadence.
The Practice: Put on music that feels good or correct for your current mood - don't worry about the genre. Close your eyes. Don't dance, simply let your body tip, sway, or rock in whatever way feels most soothing.
The Narrative: Ask your body: "How do you want to move when no one is watching?"
The Result: This is an act of Self-Reclamation. You are giving yourself permission to exist in a way that feels good to you, rather than looking good to them.
From Broken to Integrated
The post-diagnosis identity crisis is the process of mourning the person you thought you were supposed to be, so you can finally meet the person you actually are. You can begin to let go of the narrative that you are broken and instead find integration of all your parts through honouring who you truly are.
By using somatic movement, you aren't exercising. You are rewiring your internal map. You are telling your body: "The war is over. We don't have to pretend anymore." Each intuitive sway and each intentional shake is a stitch in the new tapestry of your identity. One where you are not a failed neurotypical person, but a thriving neurodivergent one.
If you are interested in working one to one with me, then book a free consultation call to discuss your concerns using the button below. I work with dozens of ND people to support them to come back to themselves.
